Tuesday, March 10, 2009

today i wish...

i wish to be such as a vagabond...to wander this beautiful earth. Breathe is it's every scent and see its hills, alleys, mountains and meadows, beaches, rivers and sail the seas... i would search for those who are in need of help, give them the time they want, the love they lack, the strength they need and be on my way to my next destination where at the moment would be unknown... i would lay under the stars, in seas of tall grass, with my unkept hair swirled around me. Peace in my heart, a smile pulling my lips tight, goosebumps on my toasted skin as fresh winds sail thru the blades of grass.... searching the mulitude of stars (blow a kiss to my 7 sisters), watching star after star fall... this is what i wish for today.

Thursday, January 8, 2009


Oh Tannerboy, why you gosta grow up? Remember all the times I held you on my hips? pushed you on swings? Walks around the square? Toy story? Babe? AhJuieeww? Kicking my back in the night? Dancing? Rocking you to sleep? Well, you are a little big for all that now... School,friends, sports,rockband...girls(better not!) I can't believe you are 14!!!
You are growing up into quite a little stud!(I use little only cuz, I still want you small!) I love seeing your smiley face, our grown up conversations and the sweet hugs you still give me!! I love you Tanner!

Friday, December 26, 2008


I asked santa for him for Christmas... another human wrapped up in shiney paper with a large bow, against his own will...is that too much to ask? Apparentely so...(damn you santa). In a close second my niece made this creative and sweet frame with a comfy (quite lovely i might add) t-shirt of my man tucked under the heart...Josie got me the last of the Twilght books (um yum) which i'm still holding out reading the last few chapters, cuz i don't want it to end...(coo-coo)

I started reading this tale about a year and a half or so ago... I admit it, was hooked(what gave it away?).

My marriage was ending, living in my house alone..I'd curl up in my blankets that gave me comfort. My little light, I threw myself into the pages, and lost myself in...Edward.

It's hilarious and quite childish, at my age... to fancy such a fictional character, I know... but he was there, and I fell.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

free therapy that works...

so the other day, i was upset, discouraged, and sat on my bed, was about to lose it... then i thought," this is LAME, i'm not gonna cry" (okay I let 2 fall)...
instead of laying back and letting them roll, i jumped on my bed, pushed play on my cd player, yelled for my sister and nieces to get in my room...

they ran in, only to see me jumping on my bed as high as I could (okay I probably have more hops than this but I have no springs), motioning for them to join in!!!
I've been to therapy, but this felt SO much better...

their excitement made my heart thump, and my tears dry up, and we were laughing ...

I love this one of GABBI!!!

Felt good to be me, to share my silliness with these girls

in moments of hurt a lot of emotions come up, embarrassment, some can be anger, some a little...sassy

and when you stop thinking about yourself and your wha wha life, you stop to help others-
and nothing feels better....

and your heart gets two sizes bigger, and your smile starts to hurt...

you think of those that you love, and how much they love you too...

your strength builds, and you can feel like anything is possible,

and suddenly, for a moment..or two you are free.

free therapy ingredients;

* bed

*good music

* letting it all go

(please excuse, my room messy and all. oh and the bras hanging out to dry, my mac is busted and I don't know how to edit on this one. lol)

you should be dancin Yeah...

No clue what's up with my hands....

take it away Gabb's....

Mandy is totally getting into it!!

Nothing feels better than a good dance when you wake up !

Monday, December 8, 2008


i love when my silly, coo-coo family gets together (me included).

i love the smells, and food and weather,

love these two, more than they know.

i love the glitter and candles, though it's just for show

i love the hugs and and giggles,

and acting like we're 2!!!

it's even better when they end up copying you..

and no holiday is the same without the goose (my vampire bite)

and wearing a dress cuz she asked me too...

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

2 bday


We have been going over and over how candles are HOT and DON'T TOUCH!
He was SO hesitant!
hAPPY bIRTHDAY, you sweet babies!!!

Spin goes the LU...

Spin, spin, spin my Lu....

Lu's noble Stead, best friend, oh and dad.


Don't trip, I know it looks so real, but... it's not.
Goose has had me draw this little crown "birthmark" several times.
We have watched every Barbie movie that has come out, (Nutcracker is the best!)
In "Princess and the Pauper," Princess Annaliese has this very birthmark which eventually outs the Pauper! So, you can so see the draw can't you?

So, don't think I'm all, "Ya kids go get Tats at this young age", gees.
I know next time I see you -you'll have one, hiding up your sleeve!